Once upon a time, there was a little girl who lived in a
small cottage deep into a forest. The
little girl was an orphaned child whose parents had abandoned her and their
small cottage. Every day she would
wander outside in the forest searching for her missing parents. One day, she came across a big beautiful
castle that was made of gold and sparkly pink rocks. There were bushes of roses planted all around
the castle. The little girl became
curious and followed the circle of rose bushes around to the back of the
castle. The big white fence was too tall
for her to see over, so she found a small hole to peek through. In the back yard was lush green grass and a
clear sparkling pool with a diving board and a slide. As the beauty of the castle mesmerized the
little girl, she did not hear the footsteps come up behind her.
“Hello there, young one.
Who are you, looking through my fence?”
The little girl, startled, realized the King of the forest
had caught her!
“ Oh Mr. King! I am
just an orphaned girl who is looking for her parents. They have left me alone and I do not think
they are coming back. I live in a small
cottage but I would love to live in a beautiful pink castle like this one…”
The King stared at the little girl as she drifted into dreaming
thoughts of living in a castle. His
heart began to soften and he knew he had to do something. A small part of him questioned if this little
girl really was an orphan or if her parents had sent her here to trick
him.
“If you do three things for me, I will give you a room in my
castle. Bring me a majestic white horse,
a carriage made of crystal, and a chair made of jewels fit for a King.”
The little girl went off into the woods that she knew so
well after exploring them so often.
First, she went to the watering hole were all the animals of the forest
gathered to drink and bathe. While she waited patiently hidden behind the bushes, a majestic white horse
appeared. The little girl climbed a
nearby tree and waited for the exact moment the horse walked underneath
her. As the horse bent down for a drink, the little girl jumped from the tree onto the horse's back. The horse was frightened and began to run but
the little girl steered the horse to the village of the gnomes. When she arrived, she tied up the horse and
was greeted by her gnome friends. She
told them her task and they began to build a carriage made of crystals and a
chair made of jewels fit for a King.
When the gnomes finished building the carriage and the
chair, they loaded the chair onto the carriage and attached the crystal harness
to the majestic white horse. The little
girl set off towards the castle to give the King the things he asked for.
To his surprise and delight, the King saw the little girl
coming over the hill in a crystal carriage pulled by a majestic white
horse. When the girl met him at the
front of the castle, she handed over the gifts and asked, “Mr. King, may I now
live in your castle?” The King heartily
chuckled and took the little girl by the hand and led her into the castle. The King gave her a room of her own and the
little girl played at the castle and rode the white horse every day. Never again did the girl search for her
missing parents because the King had provided everything she needed.
Author’s Note: In the original story, "How We Got the Name Spider Tales" Anansi, a trickster spider, asks for all the folktales that the God, Nyankupon, told to be
named after him instead of the God. The God gave Anansi a challenge so he
had to earn the the title instead of just being given it. The God gave him three animals to retrieve
for him so the tales would be named after Anansi. The animals were live bees, a boa constrictor, and a tiger. In this story I wanted
the little girl to easily be able to find a home, so I made her task less
impossible than the original story. I also wanted the King to be nicer to
her than the God was to Anansi. Although, I would hope that if an orphan
girl came to a castle the King would automatically take her in! The aspect of trickery from the original
story is very important and I wanted to incorporate that into my story with
catching the horse. The tasks for Anansi
were not easy but as a trickster spider, he was able to trick the other animals
into getting what he needed in order for the reward to be his. I like children’s fairy tales so I wanted to
incorporate that aspect into my story also.
Bibliography:
West African Folktales by William H. Barker and Cecilia Sinclair, with drawings by Cecilia Sinclair (1917).
The first paragraph with the description of the castle and gardens was a great way to start the story. It really set the scene, and I could actually envision the setting because of your strong use of descriptive imagery. I noticed a simple mistake in the sentence "Every day she would wonder outside..." where wonder should be wander. After reading your Author's note, I was completely surprised at how you created this story. This is so creative and different from the original! The spider became a little girl and the God became a King. You seemed to have taken a tale and made it more "majestic." I really enjoyed your version and am impressed how well you adapted it to a new setting and characters! Great job!
ReplyDeleteHey Cobi. After reading your author’s note, I definitely understood your thought process for your storytelling much more. I like how you changed the conceited spider, Anansi, to a sweet, little orphan girl; this created a much more likeable main character. Your version has a Disney fairytale vibe from it. (Maybe I'm saying that because of your picture, haha) It is, as Emily mentioned, very creative and original! I have never seen another story like this and I really liked it. Good job!
ReplyDeleteHey Cobi,
ReplyDeleteI think you did a great job in creating some imagery about the setting at the beginning of this story. I think you changing the main character to a small girl was a good move. I am more likely to sympathize with the small girl, and want her to succeed, than I would be with a trickster that wants a book of folktales to be named after himself. I thought your addition of the gnomes was pretty clever. I thought it was a cute way to make it easy for the orphaned girl to complete the tasks that the king asked of her. The crystal carriage gave the story a very disney princess feel. I definitely thought of Cinderella when I read the part about them putting all three of the kings wishes together. I was glad to read that the orphaned girl no longer continued to worry about where her parents were after the king took her into his home. It was nice that she finally found peace with her life. I thought you did an excellent job telling this story. It was very engaging as a reader and I enjoyed the good feel good ending that you included.